Afraid of the Unknown…

As usual, I will say that I hope you are having a lovely day/night at whatever part of the world you call home. I actually enjoy the idea of being able to talk to people from around the planet. The exchange of ideas and being able to see that there are others who share problems and hopes is very comforting as I often feel like a single unit with all of this closing in on me.

Yesterday I had problems that I could not line up and I struggled to get myself through the day, so today I have been going through my notebook so I could get some idea of what happened and where I am at the moment. Reading my notes and my blog from yesterday it looks like all of this could go all the way back to 1999 and a back injury in the working place.

I am sitting here this morning belittling myself because I did not push hard enough when the doctors back then told me that there was no real damage and it was just a result of me have the kids then returning to the industry. My boss then decided to finish me up so I could not hurt myself anymore. Now for nearly the past twenty years the bones and muscles have adjusted themselves to try to support whichever part of my body was hurting the worst off at the most risk.

Now it is seeing what can be done to fix the bones and muscles up (weight loss will still be top of the list)  to a lever that can be getting them doing what they should do. I will still have the problems with my head and brain as that is now a primary condition that has occurred because of the malignant of the spine for all those years. This means, for me, that I now have a void of the unknown until the medical profession can get my head stable so that the work can start of the massive mess with my bones and muscles.

I thank you again for reading my words. I hope that your day/night is treating you with love and kindness. Stay safe until we chat again!


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