Baby steps!

A cheery hello to all who have dropped by to see what I have been up to. I hope your day has been kind and productive for you. I have discovered today just how out of condition I truly am. Not in a psychical way but organising myself. I have always been one of those people who has a disorganised organisation, others would enter my room and see a mess, they would ask me for whatever it was they required and I could put my hands straight on it. Now I can not find a thing.

I am guessing that this is what my psychologist was referring to on Saturday…one small step at a time. I want to return to teaching (which at the moment is way outside my ability) so I set myself up as a home tutor. Today sort through my teaching paperwork, tomorrow work on making it into an introduction parcel, Wednesday look at ways to manage a working plan. Little steps that allow me to feel as if I have achieved something whilst not pushing my mind or body too much. 

Well, today has been day three of being Vegan, which my son is supporting me with. Rhys has been a Vegan for years and is just a saint in assisting me in making the transition across. I know that it will take a while and my medical team have no problems (in fact my mental health team thought it was a very good idea), so this is the easier matter I am dealing with. I do not feel as bad if I do not eat properly one day or two, but I really hate not being able to work.

I am still going to teach myself to paint after those paintings I did whilst I was staying at the mental health unit. I have always been someone who uses their hands, my grandmother taught me all those old home craft skills, which I am hoping I can do again when I can stop my hands shaking. I am a qualified hand book-binder (by trade) and I do mean traditional binding – leather work, gold-blocking, hand folded, sewn pages, the whole works, books designed to last for centuries! So it is also something I would love to ease back into…maybe make little notebooks for ladies to carry in their bags.

I am really hoping as I focus more on recreating a new life for me, taking the parts I love the most from my old world, simply forget the bits I did not like or found too difficult and create a new ME I can be happy with now, I will just naturally lose the extra weight I carry, and learn to be happy with me as I am.

Again, I would like to thank you for taking your precious time and reading my words I do appreciate it. I hope that your day treats you with kindness and you find pleasure in all you do.

Hand bookbinding
Before the advent of machine mass produced books, we had books bound by hand. It was a craft and a beautiful work of art. I know that each book I have bound as always had all my love. It is something to be proud of.

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